Holding your own! Using Assertiveness to communicate with power and get your ideas heard.

Have you ever struggled to deal with a colleague or friend who is either aggressive or insistent that their approach is the only correct one? Did you consider either being passive, or maybe going over the top to be just as aggressive as they are? Modern research with over 4,800 individuals shows Assertiveness too be among the top five personal attributes most highly correlated to success in business and personal life. This program will make you aware of the habits and behaviors which foster strong communication and high levels of team work, and enhance your personal leadership brand. The program will also alert you to habits which inhibit others from really hearing you and supporting your critical ideas.

This is a link to a Slide Share version of the presentation I made to an HR.com webinar on Jan 22, 2014

 

Give up the role of expert

professor500The sales effectiveness literature is full of descriptions of the benefits of coaching for sales leaders.  In a study of 2400 sales organizations, the Sales Executive Council found that sales teams that reported three or more effective hours of coaching per month also reported 17% higher quota attainment than teams who reported two hours or less.  Coaching works!  Yet, in the same study, senior sales executives ranked the coaching ability of their sales leaders to ninth in a list of ten key sales management competencies.  One step up from dead last!  What is preventing sales leaders from doing better in this critical skill?

As I work with sales leaders, one of the most common objections to coaching that I hear, is that many of their people are very experienced, maybe in some cases, more experienced and expert than the leader themself.    Both leaders and reps often view “coaching” as knowledge transfer, or skills transfer.  “Teaching”…  Neither of them want to engage in coaching unless both feel that the coach personally has specific knowledge or skills that the coachee doesn’t have.  An opportunity for learning (by all concerned) and better selling is lost.

How do we break this “deadly embrace”?

Here are seven key ideas to make coaching relevant and powerful for both coach and coachee:

1)  Begin by rethinking the definition of coaching.  Tim Gallwey, author of the “Inner Game of Work” says it this way:  “Coaching is unlocking a person’s potential to maximize their own performance. It is helping them to learn rather than teaching.”  There is a time to teach and a time to coach.  They are different tasks.  Use them when and where they fit.

2)  Redefine the core value that the leader-coach brings to the coaching dialogue.  Relieve the leader-coach of the responsibility to always be the subject matter “expert”.   Instead, make them responsible for being the best coach on the planet, executing  the coaching process in an excellent way.  The best athletes in the world have coaches.  Those coaches are hired for their value in terms of unleashing potential, rather than teaching a skill.  (The Gallwey book is an excellent read on this idea.)

3)  Helping the coachee develop “awareness” of the Goal, the rewards for achieving it, and the consequences of missing it.  Along the way, make sure they understand that they are the primary owner of their number.  Even though the sales manager’s attainment of their number depends on the rep attaining their goal, the coaching process should be based on the rep’s 100% ownership of their goal and 100% sense of responsibility for achieving it.  That ownership fuels their “commitment” to achieving the goal.  Coaching provides them a way to figure out how to do that.

4)  Develop a complete understanding of the current Reality, and the factors which create the gap between Goal and Reality.  Resist the temptation to begin strategy definition or action planning until the gap is very clearly defined.  This temptation is the toughest one I see sales coaches succumb to.  They go to action, once they see a connection between gap and their personal experience.  Be aware of the temptation, and hold your tongue!  Ask another question!

5)  Help the coachee create Options, a strategy for how to close the gap.  Help them think through the problem and formulate their own hypothesis for how to solve it.   Do pro’s and con’s.  Explore trade-off’s.  Don’t hand them the answer, even though the expert in you is certain you know what it is.  This is tough to do.  Hang in there!

6)  Help them develop an air-tight definition of next steps.  Be SMART, with Specific definition of task, Measure of success, confidence that the task is Achievable, Resources are clearly defined, and a specific Timeline for when this will occur.  SMART tasks facilitate accountability to the action plan, one of the key values of great coaching.

7)  When the action plan calls for teaching a critical skill that you possess….  Find the best teacher.  Maybe that’s you.  Maybe its not.  If it really is you, the sales leader, then, ok, teach it.  But teach with respect.  Ask permission to teach.  Make them seek the teaching before you force it on them.  Tough assignment:  Give them the safety and freedom to reject your offer to teach, while helping them stay accountable to their Goal.  It’s their problem.  It needs to be their solution.

Finally, as one of my coaching colleagues put it, “Don’t coach people that don’t want to be coached.”  As a manager you still have an obligation to develop your team, but if they they rebuff your help, they have made a business decision.  OK!  They own the results of their plan.  At some point, it’s best to say, “Okay, I’ll coach somewhere else.”  Like any other negotiation, the willingness to walk away always seems to strengthen your hand.  That builds your credibility.

Give up the role of expert, so that you can be free to play the role of coach.

 

Business schools discover the power of EQ in leadership development

This is a very readable journal article on how a business school invested in a program to explore and develop the emotional intelligence of its students. It is well researched and its reference list would be a great place to start your own research into the history and contributions of emotional intelligence.

My take: While the study focused on a business school, its report and its supporting research have significant implications for all business and organizational leaders.

First finding of the study:  In this study, they were able to see a significant improvement in EQ competencies after a two year program of assessment and development

Second key item of interest, the writers referenced a study in which employers ranked the core MBA program objective of “knowledge of fundamental business concepts” only 12th out of 15 dimensions explored. Those organizations identified “courses that aided in the development of interpersonal skills” as the most significant shortcoming of traditional MBA programs.

Abstract: Over the past two decades an escalating interest in the construct of emotional intelligence (EI) has made its way into the popular press, professional press, and peer reviewed journals. Not surprisingly, an interest in EI is also gaining ground in academic settings (Parker, Duffy, Wood, Bond & Hogan, 2002; Parker, Hogan, Eastabrook, Oke & Wood, 2006; Parker, Saklofske, Wood & Eastabrook, 2005). Several major longitudinal studies have laid a sound theoretical foundation supporting the development of EI competencies as a component of the MBA curriculum (Boyatzis, Stubbs & Taylor, 2002; Boyatzis & Saatcioglu, 2008). This paper will describe why and how one MBA program took theory to practice and piloted the integration of content designed to develop competencies related to emotional intelligence into its curriculum. It will also review the results of an applied multi-year study that measured the results of the curriculum pilot. The study was conducted using one of the most widely used instruments for measuring emotional intelligence, the Bar-On Emotional Quotient Inventory (Bar-On, 1997), to identify significant changes between the beginning and the end of the program in the aggregate measures of emotional intelligence competencies.

Click on the image of the report title page to read the entire report.

 

 

How can you say, “It’s not just about the numbers”?

I want to use this column to explain what I mean when I say “it’s not just about the numbers”.

In business, the viability of a firm depends on its ability to create the numbers it needs to exist! No one can debate that.  My all-time heroes, Bill Hewlett and Dave Packard, knew that and made profit their number one corporate objective.

At the same time, Bill and Dave recognized that the numbers by themselves could not create an environment where people can grow, where they can ensure the success of those they care about, and where they can make a contribution to their industry and their community.  All of those things are critical for the employees of an organization to feel that their work matters and to fully engage in the mission of the organization.

So looking at it another way, the key word in my catch-phrase is the word “just“.

The high-tech industry in particular, has become so competitive, and the importance of current quarter business results so compelling, that leaders often sacrifice everything to get “the number”. What they miss,  is that focusing just on the numbers destroys the employee engagement that is so critical to achieving the business objective. Most mature adults understand that meeting the business objectives is job one. They just don’t want it to be “job only.”

As leaders, we have to appeal to all levels of their motivation. We have to help them feel a part of a community, to feel that their company and their colleagues, really care about them as individuals, and that the company ties its business success to values that transcend more than just return to shareholders.

This is why I get so excited about deploying the power of coaching into modern organizations. It’s the best way for leaders to connect their teams to the motivation and skills they need to hit their numbers, while making their workplace a human and fulfilling place to invest their time and their skills.